She will be loved
by JacobsxImprint
Summary: Jacob depresses himself with memories of him and Bella, after she leaves him.
1. She will be loved

**She will be loved: How Jacob Black thinks about Bella when she says her final goodbye.**

**Jacob Blacks point of view. **

Isabella Marie Swan.. Beautiful, sweet, always so self sacrificing.

She is troubled. Though, isn't everybody?

I hug her tighter in my arms as her silent sobs burn more holes into my already broken heart. She sits up and says the words that will forever be in my mind. 'I love you.' I smile and chuckle silently. 'Love you more.' A tear slides down her flawless skin and I feel my heart break into a million new pieces. It's physically painful to not feel her in my arms anymore. I know she's just going back to that _bloodsucker_.

I watch the door close and turn over, letting a stray tear escape me.

I think back at the times I had with her.. I know I'll regret it later on. I couldn't care less.

_I bite my lip and stare at the phone sitting on the counter. It makes no sound. My dad asks to use it but I growl and he takes it as a no. Should I call Bella or not? I want to, but I'm so nervous. I decide to call her. I miss her so much already. _

_I dialed her number and blush under my skin. I hope she doesn't answer. Maybe it will go to voicema-_

"_Hello?" She sounded breathless. I suddenly felt guilty. Did I call at a bad time?_

"_Bella," I tried to sound formal and laughed silently at how I sounded. I sighed. It was now or never. "I believe that . . . we have a date" I pursed my lips hoping she didn't take it the wrong way._

_She didn't answer for a second or two. Finally she got it._

"_They're done? I can't believe it!" I smiled. My mind automatically went to the two motorcycles Bella had asked me to fix up a while ago, sitting in my garage. _

_  
"Yeah, they run and everything." _

"_Jacob, you are absolutely, without a doubt, the most talented and wonderful person I know. You get ten years for this one." _

_My heart soars. She has no idea how those few words made me breathless. I smile larger and dad raises an eyebrow in my direction._

"_Cool! I'm middle-aged now." I hear Bella laugh on the other line and my face got warm. I loved when she laughed._

"_I'm on my way up!" _

_  
"Bye Bells, See you soon!" _

_  
'Beep, beep, beep'_

_Guess she hung up. I ran out of the house to the garage and grab the red bike and park it under a spruce tree that isn't visible from the house. I didn't want my dad noticing and telling Charlie. I ran back and grabbed the black one and place it right beside the red one._

_They didn't look as good as they could have. I raise an eyebrow and smile when I think about the blue ribbon sitting on the floor of my garage. I run in and grab it, tucking it under my arm. I go back to the bikes and wrap it around each of the handle bars in small bows._

_  
I ran back in the house and decided to waste time. Might as well eat before I leave. I opened the fridge and dad sat in his chair at the table with a newspaper in his hand. He stared at me rather than looking at it, though._

"_What?" I asked slightly distracted. What was so interesting about me looking for food?_

"_Something up with you and Bella today?" His eyebrows formed a 'V' shape and he turned to face me all the way. What was up with his sudden interest in my business?_

"_Yeah, we're hanging out today. Why?"_

_He looked down and coughed. "Just don't get to mad okay? You don't want to.. Er.. Never mind. Have fun."_

_I didn't know what to say so I just stood with the fridge open staring at my dad. Get mad? At Bella? Not possible. _

"_What do you-" _

_I was interrupted by the roar of an engine that I knew all to well. I closed the door to the fridge and decided to eat later. I could also talk to my dad about his weird behavior later. He didn't have to worry about me getting mad at Bella. My Bella._

_I ran out of the house waving at my dad once. I looked into the truck and Bella sat in the front seat laughing. She obviously noticed the bikes. I smiled, happy to know she enjoyed the ribbons._

"_Ready?" I asked in a low voice. I was so happy, I felt like I was glowing._

_She looked over my shoulder, probably to see if my dad was there. "Yeah." She didn't sound to excited but I let it pass. She must be worried about the actuality of riding the bikes. I wouldn't let her get hurt though._

_I grabbed the bikes and put them in the bed of the truck -carefully- laying them on their sides. "Let's go." I said excited. I had been thinking about the perfect place to ride them and I had remembered there's a trail right by the cliffs, but far enough away that Bella couldn't possibly harm herself. It was vacant, right by the ocean, and we could be totally alone._

"_I know the perfect spot-no one will catch us there."_

I pull myself out of the memory and roll onto my right side. I moan at the pain and roll back over to my left. The pain from almost every bone in the right side of my body had been replaced by a new, worse pain. I close my eyes and jump into another memory.

_I jump in my car and turn the ignition. I've been so worried about Bella, I just have to see her. Bella told me about the bloodsucker, Victoria, that's after her. I hiss her name and shake a little. I calm myself before anything can happen. I see my dad peek through the window and I ignore him completely. The rain drops hard on my windshield. Would this damn rain never stop?_

_I drive silently, listening to the purr of the engine. Various pictures of Bella behind my sleepy eye lids. I'm almost to Bella's house when I smell something vile. Of course her bloodsucker was here. At least he's good for one thing, protecting Bella. I couldn't care less if he's here while I am though. Bella would never know I came anyways. Would it matter to her?_

_I pull over about three miles from her house and run the rest of the way there. I stop when I see her dark window. I hide behind a tree. I can see the leech, Edward, staring out the window. I think of the night Sam found Bella lying on the ground and hiss with every ounce of hatred in my body. _

_'I hate you.' _

_I know he can hear me. I smile as I watch his face turn pained. I think about all the times me and Bella walked hand in hand along New Beach. He doesn't belong here. I should be the one in there with my sleeping Bella. I laugh at the irony. He couldn't sleep even if he wanted to. Never be able to dream about Bella like I do every night since I set my eyes on her. But.._

_He will never have to dream about being with Bella, because he has her.  
_

_He will never have to wonder 'what if' because the if is now. _

_He will never have to feel this pain the pains me every second of every day, because she's his._

_He will never have to wonder what her lips feel like on his. He knows. _

_I close my eyes and picture her face. Her smiling face, without him. Her delicate features. Her lips. How badly I want to kiss them. Melt into her. Make her mine. What hurts more is I can see how things would turn out, too. I sigh and look back at the window. _

_I feel myself shaking and anger boils up inside of me, raising the hairs on my arms. He closed the window! Doesn't matter. I never planned on going inside. I try to deny it but I knew I wanted to. _

_I listen carefully and I can hear her heart beat normally. I smile to myself. I will definitely miss that when.. I shy away from the thought of Bella being cold like her leech. I promised myself I would never leave her, but what if I have no choice? What if when she is changed I want nothing more then to kill her? No. Never. I would never want to harm her. No matter how bad she smells. _

_I chuckle and flop myself on the cold ground. The rain still pours on me violently. I now wish more than ever I was inside, with the woman I love, keeping her warm in my arms. Instead of him. He didn't even have a heart. I was happy to say that was the one thing I had that he did not.. _

_I prepare myself to stay here all night. I lay down and get comfortable -as comfortable as you get sleeping on the soaking grass- and close my eyes. I see Bella. My Bella. I see her from a thousand different angles in my mind. I slowly drift off to sleep with the image of Bella sleeping soundly in my arms.. _

I let out a moan and open my eyes again. I was torturing myself, but it was worth it. I was happy to know she loved me though. I would always cherish _that _memory. I closed my eyes and remembered our first fight.

_I run trough the forest with Sam, Embry, Paul, and Jared. My paws hit the ground with intense speed. I love how it feels to run. To forget. I take in a deep breath and stop myself when I smell something sickeningly familiar. No. Couldn't have been. I hadn't seen Bella in.. _

_It had been a long time. I knew that much. Ever since Sam said I couldn't see or even speak with Bella, life has been a living hell. I almost considered ignoring his request -demand really- for a while. Sam saw where my thoughts were roaming and thought of Emily, his imprint._

_Her standing in the kitchen. How he got angry with her, over a little thing. How stupid. They shouldn't fight like that. Sam shook with rage and his fists tightened, showing the white of his bone under his skin. Emily's face turned frightened. Sam changed, and growled loudly, swiping Emily's beautiful face with his claw._

Sam then realized what he did. His eyes went wide with horror. He ran out of the house and-

_  
The images ended. I could feel Sam's pain. His self doubt. His hatred towards himself. _

"You didn't mean to.It was an accident, Sam._" I said, not running anymore._

"Exactly. All it takes is an accident._" Sam bowed his head in shame. I sighed. "_Now do you see why you have to stay away from Bella? You're just making things worse on yourself, Jacob."

"But I love her Sam!_" I yelled in my head. The pain was faint, only because I was in wolf form. I shuttered away from the little pain that was there. I couldn't even imagine what I would feel right now if I was in my human form._

"She's just a girl. Get over her._" Paul. Jared pictured me and Paul fighting and I growled loudly. Just a girl?_

"She isn't _just _a girl! She's the girl I love! I desire!" _Every hair on my body had raised and Sam told us to calm down. We all started running, but I barely paid any attention to where I was going. I just followed Sam and the others. I felt pity coming from Jared and I cursed him mentally. I didn't need his pity._

_I took another deep breath of the air and knew for a fact the scent I smelt. Bella.._

"Jacob, don't! Do you want to put her in harms way!?_" Sam._

_I ignored him completely and ran towards the truck. I remembered I was in wolf form and ran back into the woods fast, changing back into human. I slipped my sweat pants off my leg and pulled them on._

_I walked cautiously up the the too familiar red '53 Chevy truck. _

_I looked in her window expecting her to look up. She had a piece of paper, and she was drawing diamonds in a row. The other four ran quickly behind me and Sam stood farthest from me. He nodded once. I sighed and tapped against her door._

_She jumped, startled, and looked right into my eyes. I looked at her beautiful face. Her brown, now frightened, eyes. Her long brown hair surrounding it, flowing freely. Her heart shaped face. The scarlet on her cheeks. Her blank expression. I couldn't hurt her, but when if I slipped like Sam did? How could I live with myself? I had to end this, once and for all. For Bella._

"_What are you doing here, Bella?" I growled. I hated how she looked me over, pain all over her face. She looked like she was on the verge of crying. I wanted to comfort her, but stood still. _

"_Jacob?" Bella whispered. I didn't know what to say, so I just stared. I didn't know how my face would look to her, but I hope it didn't look to angry._

_Her face turned pained and she gripped her side. She struggled in the car like she needed air. I started to panic. Did I hurt her that badly?_

"_What do you want?" I got irritated as her face went from pained, to angry, to frustrated, to pained again. Bella sat there for a moment just watching me._

"_I want to talk to you." She said in a weak voice. I stood straiter and sighed. I knew that much. She still didn't get that I couldn't be with her._

"_Go ahead" I said through my teeth. I glared at her. I had never glared at her, never even needed to._

"_Alone!" She hissed. Her voice was loud and vicious. Her face was no longer sweet or pained, but wrinkled with rage._

_I looked behind me, just now remembering my brothers standing behind me. I turned to the only person who I needed permission from. Sam._

_Sam nodded once, and I felt my stomach drop. _

"_Ta-til." Grave. I knew what he was implying. I had to keep my anger under control. I nodded once and Paul shook his head. My brothers followed Sam into my house. _

_I finally turned back around. "Okay." I said in a regular tone. My face became calmer as well, but also more hopeless. I couldn't stop frowning. I took a little step back away from Bella._

_She took a deep breath and looked right in my eyes. Her beautiful brown eyes.._

"_You know what I want to know." I knew. I just couldn't answer. I wanted to, but I knew my brothers could hear. I got angry again and looked down at her._

"_Can we walk?" She asked. I listened to Sam talk to me about saying no, but I couldn't refuse. There was no way. She opened her door and Jared and Sam stared at her, and sighed. Paul had gone off to the kitchen, I suspect. She started walking towards the woods and I swallowed once and started following her._

_She made a lot of noise. I wanted to make fun of her for being so loud, but I resisted. She turned back around and looked at me. She seemed surprised that I was right beside her. Bella turned back forward and kept walking. Soon enough, Sam and the other were out of view. I knew that's what she wanted. Even if he wasn't visible, he would hear._

_She just kept walking, and walking. Bella never stopped. I sighed quietly and swung myself in front of her, stopping her in her path. _

"_Let's get this over with." I was getting very impatient. She didn't speak, but I knew what she wanted. "It;s not what you think. It's not what I thought – I was way off."_

_  
She stopped me from finishing my speech. "So what is it then?" I pictured telling her. How she would react. Would she hate me? What would Sam say? Do I care what Sam would say? I didn't want to hurt her.. _

"_I can't tell you." I said quietly. I knew she could hear._

_She got mad and snapped her mouth shut. Her jaw tightened and she spoke through her teeth. "I thought we were friends." I felt a new pain in my stomach. "We were." I dropped my eyes to her feet, but she never really seemed to notice. Her breathing got faster and her face turned red._

"_But you don't need friends anymore. You have Sam. Isn't that nice – you've always looked up to him so much." She hissed at me. I suddenly felt defensive for my brother._

"_I didn't understand him before."_

"_And now you've seen the light. Hallelujah."_

"_It wasn't like I thought it was. This isn't Sam's fault. He's helping me as much as he can." I looked over her shoulder where I knew Sam would be. He thanked me and I nodded, knowing he wouldn't see. I looked back down at Bella, angry now._

"_He's helping you. Naturally." She repeated me. I started shaking and breathing hard. I had to end this fast. I had to calm myself._

"_Jacob, please. Won't you tell me what happened? Maybe I can help." I was still shaking when I answered her back._

"_No one can help me now." I moaned the words and my voice broke. How much I wish that wasn't true._

_She stared at me with worry painted on her face._

"_What did he do to you?" She demanded. She started to get tears in her eyes. She put her hand out to touch me and stepped forward. I jumped away and held up my arms._

"_Don't touch me." I whispered. That would only make things worse._

"_Is Sam catching?" She mumbled. Her tears fell over down her cheek. I wanted to comfort her. To wipe them away, but she got there first._

"_Stop blaming Sam." I said fast. I didn't mean to. I suddenly felt like I had to do something so I reached up to twist my hair around, but I found nothing. Due to being a werewolf, I had to cut all my hair off. I dropped my hands to my sides._

"_Then who should I blame?" She asked._

_I almost smiled, but I resisted it. "You don't want to hear that." She didn't._

"_The hell I don't!" She snapped. "I want to know, and I want to know _now_" She yelled back. "You're wrong." I snapped back. I didn't want to hurt her more._

"_Don't you dare tell me I'm wrong – I'm sure not the one who got brainwashed! Tell me now whose fault this all is, if it's not your precious Sam!" She yelled to me. Anger flared up in me again. Brainwashed?_

"_You asked for it." I growled. "If you want to blame someone, why don't you point your finger at those filthy, reeking bloodsuckers that you love so much!" I regretted the words that came out of my mouth. I wanted to disappear. I hated myself. Her mouth fell open and her breathing became louder. She didn't close her mouth. She didn't talk._

"_I told you that you didn't want to hear it." I said hoping to take some of the pain away._

"_I don't understand who you mean." She whispered. I sighed. I raised an eyebrow in disbelief. "I think you understand exactly who I mean. You're not going to make me say it, are you? I don't like hurting you."_

"_I don't understand what you mean." She repeated. How stupid._

"_The Cullens." I said it slowly, drawing out the word. Her face turned pained instantly. "I saw that – I can see in your eyes what it does to you when I say their name." And I hated it._

_She shook her head back in fourth in denial. _

"_Don't tell me you're listening to Billy's superstitious nonsense now." She was mocking my tone._

"_He knows more than I gave him credit for."_

"_Be serious, Jacob." I glared, hard, back at Bella. Serious? The truth is a beautiful and terrible thing, and should therefore be treated with great caution._

I rolled onto my back gasping for air. How could I have hurt her like that? I was a monster! I started sobbing. My dad once said facing it was the only way to get through it. I couldn't stand facing it! This pain was unbearable. I desired Bella. I would love her until gravity gave up on me. Even after! I sobbed harder into my pillow, finally falling into a much needed sleep where I could -once again- dream about my Bella.


	2. Dream

**Chapter two: Dreaming.**

This chapter takes place right after Jacob fell asleep. There are some New moon spoilers. Jacob's dreaming about Chapter eighteen and a little of the ending of chapter seventeen in New Moon his point of view. This was a hard chapter to start, but when I got into it I really liked writing it. I have to say, I am very, very depressed that I didn't get a _single _review for the first chapter, and only ten views! Come on people. :

I noticed I forgot to use a disclaimer for the first chapter. So..

**Disclaimer:**  
Author: I own twilight :

Stephenie Meyer: Really now?

Author: Uh.. Uh! No..

Stephenie Meyer: That's what I thought!

Author: Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight. I own nothing but the plot.

**Cough**

Author: But if I did..

Stephenie Meyer: Smack

I hope you all enjoy this chapter. Cough review!

**Jacob Blacks point of view: **

My finger trembles inches from the small doorbell. I can feel sweat falling down my forehead, and it wasn't because I had a temperature of one-o-eight. I swallow hard and try to stop the violent shutters that course through my body.

I can smell it. The bloodsucking _leech _of Bella's. The smell is sickeningly sweet. Every breath I take it burns my nose. The smell _alone _makes me want to rip whatever the foul smell was coming from into a million pieces. But I wouldn't. Couldn't. She was Bella's friend. And that's the reason I was here..

I had to tell Bella that I couldn't be her friend as long as the _bloodsucker _was here. I shutter again and breath through my mouth. I love Bella - I couldn't deny that- but I couldn't be friends with her if it meant her vampire would be here.

I close my eyes and try breathing for a few short minutes. Bella comes to mind right away, as always. I think about all the days we would sit in my garage, while I fixed up all kinds of junk. Every little detail.

Bella's perfect laugh. The sound our soda cans make when we clink them together. How she would grip her side every time _he _came up in her mind.

I let out a huge gasp of air and opened my heavy eyelids. I reached towards the doorbell, my hand trembling, and I stop close my eyes again.

Finally, I push the button and exhale when I realize I was holding my breath. This shouldn't be this hard..

"Hold on!" A familiar, beautiful voice shouted from inside. My super sensitive ears could hear every move, and word, said. I listened intently.

"Bella." The leech. I was positive it was her. The stench coming off her diamond hard skin still burned in my nose. "I have a fairly good guess who that might be, and I think I'd better step out."

I smirked. It seemed frustrated. I looked back behind me and Jared nodded once.

"Guess?" Bella said, confused. Her voice alone sent butterflies fluttering through my stomach.

"If this is a repeat of my egregious lapse in foresight yesterday, then it's most likely Jacob Black or one of his friends."

A strange noise came from inside my chest and I shuttered. I hated how she said my name.

"You can't see werewolves?" Bella all but gasped.

"So it would seem." I growled and pushed the doorbell two more times, quickly.

"You don't have to go anywhere, Alice. You were her first." I could feel betrayal across my face, and then pain. Was I nothing to this girl who meant so much to me? Did she care that every word she said sent a pang of pain through me? They left her in pieces! How could she forgive them so easily? Stupid, beautiful, self sacrificing, girl.

"Trust me- it wouldn't be a good idea to have me and Jacob Black in a room together." I shuttered.

I heard a window open and heard the soft 'whoosh' as the bloodsucker ran away.

I rang the doorbell once again. I reached for the doorbell ring it a fifth time when Bella opened the door.

I was still shaking slightly. I expected the violent shutters to end when I saw Bella, but nothing changed -except the loss for words.-

Bella looked behind me towards Embry and Jared. Finally she looked back at me and stared.

"Hey." She said finally. I was about to talk, but I wanted to make sure the bloodsucker was really gone. I pursed my lips and looked inside her dark house.

"She's not here. Do you need something?" She hissed.

"You're alone?" Bella sighed. "Yes."

"Can I talk to you a minute?" I asked.

"_Of course _you can, Jacob. Come on in."

"Jacob." Embry called from the car. It was nothing louder than a whisper, but I heard it. I turned my head to look in his direction. He shook his head.

"Chicken." Bella hissed. I looked back at her and glared down. I stomped up the sidewalk and pushed her aside. "No!" Jared moaned.

I kept walking until I got to the hallway, and stopped. I looked over to the couch and noticed a large pile of blankets and pillows. I felt angry.

"Slumber party?" I asked sarcastically.

"Yeah." Bella mimicked my tone. "What is it to you?" I took a deep breath trying to calm myself, and almost gagged. Her house reeked.

"Where's your 'friend'?"

"She had some errands to run. Look, Jacob, what do you want?" I couldn't stand being in this room. It made me edgier. I started quivering.

I moved to the kitchen, with Bella close behind me. I paced by the counter. Suddenly, Bella stepped in front of me and I had no choice but to stop.

"Hey. What's your problem?"

"I don't like having to be here." I admitted. She winced, and I felt bad.

"Then I'm sorry you had to come. Why don't you tell me what you need so you can leave?" She muttered quietly.

"I just have to ask you a couple of questions. It shouldn't take long. We have to get back for the funeral." I frowned remembered poor Harry Clearwater had passed away recently. Billy's been moping around all day.

"Okay. Get it over with then." She said in a hurt voice. She tried hiding it but, hey, I'm not stupid. She's a really bad liar.

I took a deep breath and calmed myself down. I stopped trembling. I decided to start with the easiest of the questions.

"One of the Cullens is staying here with you." I stated.

"Yes. Alice Cullen." I nodded.

"How long is she here for?" I asked, not quite sure if I wanted to hear the answer.

"As long as she wants to be. It's an open invitation." She hissed. It stung, but I moved on.

"Do you think you could . . . please . . . explain to her about the other one-Victoria?" I asked. Bella paled and her eyes went wide.

"I told her about that." I nodded.

"You should know that we can only watch our own lands with a Cullen here. You'll be safe in La Push. I can't protect you here." Although I wish I could. Maybe the Cullen girl was good for something. If she couldn't handle the red headed leech Bella would be helpless.. She would d-. I got rid of the thought.

Something moved around outside. The bloodsucker was back. I looked out the dark window and waited for any sign of movement.

"Is that all?" Bella interrupted. "Just one more thing." I said, still looking for something out the window. This was the hardest question I would have to ask her. If she said yes, I would be heartbroken. I knew she would forgive _him_. No matter what he did to her. He's the reason Bella and I aren't together. The reason Bella grips her side so tightly whenever someone reminds her of him. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath.

"Yes?" She prompted when I didn't continue.

"Are the res of them coming back now?" I asked in a quiet voice. After a few seconds she didn't answer and I turned from the window to face her. "Well?" I asked. I struggled to conceal the tension I was feeling.

"No." Bella said finally. I felt relief flutter through my body. "They aren't coming back."

"Okay. That's all." I said. Bella glared at me and her face got red.

"Well, run along now. Go tell Sam that the scary monsters aren't coming to get you." Her words stung, but I didn't want to make things worse. "Okay." I said simply. Her face got redder and redder and I couldn't take it. I walked out of the kitchen in one swift movement, stepping around Bella.

I got to the front door and sighed. I couldn't just leave her. Not like this. I walked quietly back to the kitchen and stopped at the door when I noticed her slumped against the counter with her face buried in her hands. Her breathing became louder.

"Bella . . .?" I asked.

She pulled her face out of her hands. Something sparkling in her hand caught my eye. She was crying. I frowned deeply and thought about walking over there to comfort her. Did she want that? Doesn't matter.

I walked quickly to stand in front of her. She was so small! I had to duck my head to make it so our eyes were almost on the same lever.

"Did it again, didn't I?" I asked.

"Did what?" She asked. Her voice cracked, cutting yet another hole in my heart.

"Broke my promise. Sorry."

"'S'okay. I started it this time." She mumbled. Another hole.

"I knew how you felt about them. It shouldn't have taken me by surprise like that." I whispered.

"Sorry."

"Let's not worry about it, okay? She's just visiting, right? She'll leave, and things will go back to normal." I said darkly. Even a few minutes away from Bella was unbearable. Could I last three days? A week? Longer . . .?

"Can't I be friends with you both at the same time?" She sounded so hurt. I wish we could. "No, I don't think you can." She sniffed and looked down.

"But you'll wait, right? You'll still be my friend, even though I love Alice, too?" My heart skipped a beat. She had never said she loved me.. I smiled and blushed. Maybe when the leech left Bella and I could be together. I regretted thinking this.

"Yeah, I'll always be your friend. No matter what you love." She was still looking down. "Promise?"

"Promise." I pursed my lips, and wound my arms around her. She leaned again my chest and sniffled. "This sucks."

"Yeah." I sniffed her hair and trembled. Her beautiful usually floral smell was now replaced with a horrible smell. _Her _smell. "Ew." I said, breathing through my mouth.

"_What!_" She demanded. She looked up and glared. "Why does everyone keep doing that to me? I don't smell!" I smiled.

"Yes, you do-you smell like _them. _Blech. Too sweet-sickly sweet. And . . . icy. It burns my nose." Her eyes went wide. "Really? But why would Alice thing I smelled, too, then?" She asked. Her words offended me. Stupid leech.

"Huh. Maybe I don't smell so good to her, either. Huh."

"Well, you both smell fine to me." She said putting her head back onto my chest.

"I'll miss you. Every minute. I hope she leaves soon." I whispered. I really did hope so. A day without Bella is like a day without sunshine.

"It really doesn't have to be that way, Jake." She whispered. I sighed. I wish it were simpler though.

"Yes, it really does, Bella. You . . . love her." Wince. "So I'd better not get anywhere near her. I'm not sure that I'm even-tempered enough to handle that. Sam would be mad if I broke the treaty, and you probably wouldn't like it too much if I killed your friend." I ended sarcastically. She pulled away from me, but I tightened my grip on her.

"There's no point in avoiding the truth. That's the way things are, Bells." She frowned deeper.

"I do _not _like the way things are." She looked down and I pursed my lips, again. I let go of her with my right arm cupped my hand under her chin and forced her to look up. "Yeah. It was easier when we were both human, wasn't it?" I asked, she sighed.

We sat there, not talking, for a long time. She looked so sad. I wanted nothing more than to kiss the sadness away. I looked down at her lips and imagined how they would feel on mine. My hands began trembling.

I used my left hand -right hand still cupped under her chin- and trailed my fingertips across her cheek, down to her jaw. I grabbed her face with my hand and whispered her name. She didn't move.

I had never kissed a girl before. I hadn't ever even liked somebody like this. It would be so simple. She loved me, she just wouldn't admit it. I heard the bloodsucker sneak back in the window and stand in the hallway. She hissed but I ignored her. Bella didn't seem to notice.

All I would have to do is dip my head down a little and touch my lips to hers. Now or never. Slowly, I leaned my head down to hers. My eyes never left hers. Did she want to kiss me back? She looked so unsure. Just a little closer. The slightest bend of my head and our lips would be touching. Just a little..

Suddenly, the phone rang and we both jumped. It pushed us farther apart. I hated the short distance between our lips. Her eyes slid to the phone and I took my hand from under her chin and answered.

"Swan residence." I said, intensely.

"Hello, This is Dr. Carlisle Cullen. Can I speak with Charlie, please?" I sat up strait letting go of Bella's face. My hand felt cold. Another Cullen!?

"He's not here." I hissed.

"May I ask where he is, please?"

"He's at the funeral."

'Beep'. He hung up. I hung up shortly afterwards.

"Filthy bloodsucker." I moaned.

"Who did you just hand up on? In _my _house on_ my _phone?" Bella gasped. I looked back at her.

"Easy! He hung up on me!"

"He? Who was it?!" It hurt to hear the words. She was really asking if it was the bloodsucker that had left her.

"_Dr._ Carlisle Cullen." I sneered. Her face turned sad.

"Why didn't you let me talk to him?!" She pushed.

"He didn't ask for you. He asked where Charlie was and I told him. I don't think I broke any rules of etiquette." I replied coldly. My hands started shaking. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath -trying to calm myself- and smelt the sickeningly sweet smell of leech. That only made things worse. The Cullen was in the other room, and I looked. I started trembling.

"Bye, Bells." I said and ran for the front door. Bella stood up after me and tried to follow me. "What is it?" She begged. I turned back on my heels and prepared to go the other way when Bella ran into me. "Shit!" I said under my breath. I spun around again, and knocked Bella sideways. Our legs got tangles up and we both fell together.

"Shoot, ow!" She squeaked. I tried to get away fast, but I just wasn't fast enough. Finally, we got our legs untangled and I got up and darted for the back door. I had no clue where the leech was coming from, but I had to get out of the house. I got to the door, and _she _was standing there.

Her face was paler than it usually is. Her eyes dark. I skidded to a stop, and froze. She stood motionless at the foot of the stairs. She was trembling.

"Bella." She gasped. Bella ran up to be beside her and let out a cry. "Alice, what's wrong?"

Finally, she looked down at Bella, just noticing her and her eyes were wide with pain.

"Edward." She whispered.

All hope I had disappeared at that moment.


End file.
